I am not sure I ever had a fashion style. Back to school was a fun one. New year, new wardrobe, new beginning. I wanted to be one of the cool kids, be seen as someone who had style. Thus, I was putting so much effort at the beginning of the year to look super stylish. To give up a month later. First, what was called ‘stylish’ at the time did not suit my body shape at all. Second, I did not even like it!
The style I liked though, when I dared putting it on, got me a fair share of bullying, mockery and nasty comments.
Teenagers… Nasty little creatures, aren’t they?
If only that was just a teenager trait. But no, it is widespread across all demographics and even though it is more subtle as you grow up, it is still there, insidious and demoralizing.
When I left high school, I thought I’d be free to wear whatever I wanted. I always had a thing for high heels and despite nasty comments from my high school math teacher, I still was very keen on wearing them. I have also always preferred dresses to trousers and colorful combinations to a minimalist style.
The heels got me comments. The dresses got me catcalls. The colours got me mockery. Great… The more the things change, the more they stay the same.
I think my time in New Zealand changed me. Seeing everybody wear whatever they wanted whenever had me reconsider. I experienced such a great fashion freedom that when I got back home, there was absolutely no way I’d let a few idiots ruin my fun and prevent me from wearing what I loved. The comments and catcalls were still there but I was getting better at ignoring them.
Is their life so boring and miserable that they have to ruin other’s fun?! Why do people feel like they can judge others? Or have a say on how they lead their life? Mind your own business for god sake.
That being said… I still struggle to be completely at ease wearing the fashion piece I love. See that jumpsuit? Gorgeous, right? Colorful, funky, bold. It makes quite the statement. I have worn it a few times – for this shoot and twice at work. And inevitably, I got looks, comments and mocking smiles. Not from my friends or colleagues. Just strangers in the street who feels like they are allowed to judge someone who they don’t know and have never talked to.
I am trying to make abstractions of the unpleasant consequences of trying something different. Truth is, even though I am trying hard to feel comfortable with my fashion tastes, I still always feel like I have to blend in. As confident as I might be, people’s gaze is incredibly heavy. Ironic, isn’t it?! How everybody wants to be unique, different, special but does not allow others to be.
I am getting stronger though and wearing bolder pieces more and more often. You might have noticed after all. How my fashion post are more and more colourful. How I am more comfortable posing for photos in the street. And how I experience with pieces I had never worn before.
Side note, the other day, I spotted someone giving me the gaze, looked at them and rolled my eyes right at them. Message sent and received, crystal clear. Mind your own business. Childish but much needed.
Shop the post
What do you think? Do you relate to this post? Have you ever felt judge for what you wear? Have you ever felt like you can be yourself in fashion because of people’s gaze? What do you do to change that?
Thanks a lot for reading. Hope you liked this post.
See you soon,